Dear Teen,
You can’t change other people, or change the past, so what CAN you do? Sometimes you may feel powerless in a situation but there is always something you can do. You may not be able to make another person be different or do what you want them to do, or change a situation but you certainly have power over what YOU do. The friends you have, the choices you make around social situations, how you do in school, etc. are all things you have control over. So you might have to literally ask yourself…what CAN I do? Think about all the things in your life that you do have control over: like going to school, doing all of your homework and classwork, being reliable with responsibilities and commitments, staying out of trouble (no drugs/alcohol, no breaking the law), keeping a positive attitude and being a good person. In other words, all the things you can do that have a positive impact on your life. If life at home is really difficult for you and you need to get out of the house, get a job or volunteer somewhere, join a sports team, club or gym. These are things that are good for YOU and build on who you are and they get you out of the house doing something positive for YOU! This is not a way to fix the problem but it is a way to move forward and not be stuck feeling there is nothing you can do. As you get older the opportunities to have control in your life continue to grow, especially if you have been a good person staying out of trouble. So focus on the positive and see if you can find some things that make you feel good about yourself. As your sense of control in your life develops so does self-confidence and the maturity to handle anything life throws at you.
Good friends-Doing your best in school-Holding down a job-Volunteering or community service-Playing a sport-Participating in a club-Working on a hobby-Exploring an interest-Taking care of yourself:physically, emotionally, mentally-Helping others-The list goes on!