Dear Teen,
Ever wonder why teen relationships rarely last very long? You might think…first love and forever! But that is clearly not the case. Sometimes it seems like teens go from one relationship to the next at light speed! Why are they being so crazy about relationships? Put simply, they are practicing relationships. This is the time in their lives to start figuring out what they do and do not like in a relationship, what it’s like to be close to someone, be attracted to someone. Be vulnerable. It is a chance to figure out what they like in another person and learn new things about themselves. A new relationship may start out really exciting and fun and many teens rush into it, mostly because at that point the relationship is based on physical attraction alone. If hormones and attraction get in the way, try to slow down enough to feel good about what you are doing. If you do something physical or sexual with another person make sure it is what YOU want too. Take the time to get to know the person first, there really is no hurry. When I ask teens what the most important thing in a relationship is they almost always say trust. And trust takes time. The relationship needs a foundation first and if that foundation starts by being about trust you’ve made a great start! Practicing relationships means you will most certainly make mistakes along the way. Mistakes are a great way to learn, just make sure you don’t keep making the same ones! Learn from your mistakes and make sure you keep setting your personal bar a little higher each time. Think about what you want in a relationship and then make sure that’s what you get. For example: trust, respect, fun, communication, attraction, sense of humor, open-minded, the list could go on and on. What would make YOU happy? And what do YOU have to offer another person? It’s all about getting to know yourself and trusting yourself first. Then you can let another person in and have a great experience. I’m not sure if practice makes perfect, but it will certainly help you understand what you might want!
