Dear Parent,
If your teen gets in trouble in any way, especially about drugs or alcohol…and they are a driver…and you have given them the car…even if you make them pay for gas…PLEASE TAKE THE CAR! I say this so emphatically because it really pisses me off. I may drive on that same road, the people I love drive on that same road, innocent people may get hurt. Drugs and alcohol do impare anyone’s ability to drive. Alcohol is obvious, but even marijuana effects driving ability, mostly with slower reaction times. Some teens who use marijuana will say they can drive better while high, they are more relaxed. I absolutely do not agree. And the statistics will support my side. If you are going to get behind the wheel of a huge, heavy moving vehicle you better be alert, attentive and ready. So if your teen has violated your trust, really in any way, but most emphatically if drugs or alcohol are involved…take the car now! Then give them a way to earn it back. Most likely if they are using a substance, there have been signs: grades dropping, poor attendance at school, attitude changes, less communicative, different friends, etc. So tell them they can earn it back by obviously…NO MORE DRUGS OR ALCOHOL. They can earn it back by having perfect attendance, and I mean NO tardies or unexcused absences (and don’t excuse them unless they are truly sick). They can earn it back by turning in all schoolwork and showing that their grades are improving. Tell them they have to maintain a C or better grade point average. They need to share where they are going and who they are with and friend’s parent’s contact information. Then give it 2 weeks and at the end of the 2 weeks you will check their attendance, grades, and assess behavior. Then you will all discuss whether they can get the car back. No I didn’t forget about the fact that they may have been using drugs or alcohol, that’s a whole other issue that needs your immediate and serious attention. So start drug testing them to get a baseline of how big and serious the problem is. I recommend taking them in to see the doctor for an in depth drug screening. That’s probably the only way you will get a very accurate picture of what you are all dealing with. Then listen to the doctor’s recommendations, and seek out professional help for the entire family. And get your teen clean and sober before allowing them back on the road. They need to earn the privilege of driving, even if it is an inconvenience to you.