Dear Parent,
Please do not give your teen an Uber account so they can get home safely when out drinking or using drugs. Are you kidding me? Think of the message this sends to them! It really says that you expect them to party and jeopardize their ability to drive, so be ready! The message should always be “I don’t ever want you to drink or use drugs, it’s against the law and not worth it.” But if your teen has made a poor choice and has used alcohol or drugs, please tell them “Do not drive the car, I will come and get you.” You have to also agree, and tell them, that you will not get mad at them or yell at them, but that you most certainly will have a conversation about their choices. The message should always be that drinking and drugs are not acceptable. I hear many parents say “Well, you know, teenagers are going to party so that’s OK as long as they are safe.” Never say it is OK! You have to always say it is unacceptable and that there will be consequences for their actions. I know there is a huge chance that they will try alcohol and drugs but your message needs to be consistent. Remember too that it is against the law for teens under 21 (18 in some places) to use alcohol and it is against the law for everyone to drive under the influence of anything. And then if or when they blow it, you can have a conversation addressing their actions and choices. But if your message is too lax, they very well may take advantage of it thinking you’re cool with them using. You want to establish mutual trust. They need to know that you mean what you say and you need to know they will do the right thing. If they make a mistake, they need to be able to come to you and talk with you about it. If they know you mean what you say they just might try to rise to that and maintain a trusting relationship with you. So if you think an Uber account is the answer it simply is not. YOU are the answer and you need to be ready to go pick them up if the occasion arises. This will also afford an opportunity to talk about what they are doing and how serious it is. You need to know if your teen is in serious trouble. Never give that away for the convenience of a lift home.